Rasputin On A Ritz

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I’ve lost my pen for poetry
and my tongue for wit
when I think of life,
I’m truly sick of it
I beg the sky for death
and wonder when I’ll end
will I be a martyr,
or just, to hell, descend?
I’d rather die in vain
than live this life of pain
please, won’t someone kill me,
so I may live again?

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Fingers Singed

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I once walked with white magick
and spelled it with a “k”
and something I find tragic
is that I lost my way
it’s easy to blame sorrow
for my blackened path
as the power I would borrow
filled me with hate and wrath
but it was my weak mind
that led my heart astray
I elected to go blind
to keep myself at bay.

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This is something I whipped up this morning since I wasn’t able to sleep last night. Kinda started it in my head around 5am. It’s been humid as fuck here, and that’s not ok. Anyway, I was actually contemplating submitting this to a poetry contest since a good deal of my stuff is quite graphic, vulgar, or depressing (my take, at least) and I guess some people need to be eased into that. Either that or doing a touch up on Hymns of the Harbinger, since I’ve won a contest with that before as well. Some parts are a little clunky, I pretty much change something with that almost every time I read it. If you are actually reading this, and read that piece, please, for the love of all that is unholy, give me some fucking opinions jesus fucking shitting dick nipples.

Anyway, thanks for baring with me all this time. This piece gave me a little bit of trouble, but I am assuming that’s from allowing myself to fall out of practice. Figured I’d post a pic of the piece since I never post pictures with my stuff. If you are wondering why I am actually using capital letters in this message, it’s because I’m using ms word at work and it auto-caps. I am almost stubborn enough to turn every capital letter into a lowercase letter. Stay weird.

K Hole

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I’ve lost so many friends
to the demons of addiction
and like a battered wife,
I live for my affliction
I’m now more than dependent,
it started just for fun
I thought the pleasure innocent,
’til the demons finally won.

loosely inspired by my friend AJ’s poem
https://incarceratedshadows.wordpress.com/2017/06/14/dead-or-alive/
make sure to check him out!

Tedium

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Forever, I am wasting
my life and time away
I’d sell my very soul
for some joy today
my pleasures have turned dull,
and my woes routine
I hope that someday soon
existence will end scene.

 

 

have 2 unfinished pieces from a few weeks ago on my desk. they were coming along well but i lost the wind. i’ll try and get them finished and up here. thanks for sticking with me being MIA all the time

Homesick

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Sometimes I feel imprisoned,
but it’s of my own doing
I didn’t build the walls,
but I walked in the cage

The key is in my hand –
the door is never locked
there’s safety in the pain
and routine in the dark

I see the sun outside
and tan from time to time
a passing novelty
that somehow keeps me sane

Decaying in this cage,
I leave once in a while
but always saunter back
longing to be home.

Greed

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Its eyes glistened like diamonds,
its scales shimmered with gold
its tails, they whipped and whirled,
as slowly, it approached

Its rancid breath engulfed me,
empty, I felt so cold
its teeth, they dripped rancid venom
that charred the ground beneath

Its claws reached out to touch me,
caressing my scarred, naive skin
its tongue encircled my ear,
as ever close, it crept

Three arms, they wrapped around me,
as they warmed me within
its horns, they parted my hair,
in its crooked, clawed embrace

With fire in its past footsteps,
it climbed upon my back
it prodded me to go forward,
as I walked forth in daze

I happened across a beggar,
crippled, somehow in a shack
I asked the beast its name,
and it only voiced desire

not sure how i feel about this one, but its nice to be in the writing mood again

Squatter’s Rights

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A demon lives in my hall bathroom,
and I’m not sure why
thrice before, in vain, I’ve asked him
but I guess he’s shy
I’ve tried before to speculate –
it never sits quite right
he hates when I look in my mirror,
yet only late at night
sometimes, he crashes on my couch,
or loiters in the hall
three years now, he’s lived rent free
god, what fucking gall!
I have tried to evict him,
but he saunters back
I guess that he’s good company,
so I cut him some slack
either way, he’s quite the burden
I wish not to bare,
tonight, I’ll burn the whole town down
to say his tab is square!

The Prophet Mohammad Raped a Nine Year Old Girl

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never got around to posting this one, but hey, here it is!

Religion is just mind control
that preys upon the meek
priest say give unto Caesar
because they know we’re weak
brainwashing children is so easy
when you beat their mother
and teach the little girls
they better fuck their brother
christians are a fucking joke
and jews: a dying breed
muslims burn women with acid
just because they read
the crusades and holocaust
should proof, enough be
and who the fuck scoffs at bacon?
curse the clove-ed hoof
and I fucking know not what
a god-damn sikh is
but I know that that head-wrap
should just mop up jizz
even the well learn-ed Buddha
said he wasn’t god
but man, he did not listen
the hairless ape is flawed
and oh, those new age wiccans,
pagans, and druids, too
a written language was not
what that ripped off culture knew
and some fucking purple rocks
a cleansing, does not make
why not just drink bleach
or try to fuck a rake
the bible says that every slave
should serve their master well
but if you mix two fabrics
you’re going straight to hell
it also says the only right
that women have is silence
so peaceful is religion
when it takes a break from violence
and hindus, oh my god, the hindus
worshiping a rat
I guess it is so fitting
for a godly man is that
and I think that there are still
zoroastrians on Earth
and I swear, their number doubles
with each and every birth
tell me, now, where is god
when children die by fire?
and don’t say shit about his ways
you know you’re just a liar
and if there really is a god,
please, strike me down
your children have ruined this Earth
our water has turned brown
god, it seems, is just a lie
to keep the masses meek
controlled by fear and taxes
while behind us, royals sneak.

Candiru

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still cant find my missing pieces. wrote this for my friend’s birthday

I struggle now, to half-remember
what happenstance did spark the ember
of something once, I prayed for, yearned,
to see the day when the world burned

Alas, it seems, that I was wrong,
still beautiful is Banshee’s song
curse the day when angels fell,
bringing forth this living hell

And as this world, it turns to shit
oh, I can’t help but laugh a bit
life, it seems, is just a pox
with Nat Geo now owned by Fox.

Not Dead Yet

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Dust

What was it that I saw
when I looked into death?
’twas not a gaping maw,
so frigid, was its breath
a blackness from the void,
it came to laugh at me
with my life, it toyed
as it took from me three

I tried so hard to cry,
burdened with each breath
I’d rather just get high
off the smell of Death.

 

I have had a lot of bad shit happen in the past few months, so please excuse the extended absence. I have a few pieces that I have written in this time scattered around my apartment on various pieces of paper. I will try to find them and post them as I do. Hope all is well, you mutant fucks.

witty title

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wrote this for my friend at 5 am, so its pretty rough, but hey, shit happens, then you die.

A current carved through canyons
was the work of me
I’ve far too many stories
involving apple trees
germs and evolution,
like me: only a theory,
and I won’t weigh you down,
but I’ll caress your mass
the feather and the stone
were never meant to pass

I’ll never hold a hand,
but I can bounce a ball
I topple trees and tyrants,
no matter large or small
what am I?

CCCXLVI – ‘Til Death

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I never thought I’d live alone
by my own volition
I thought this curs-ed life of mine
was merely superstition
but then, one night, my sweetheart said
my life: her dream’s fruition
and satisfying her desire
was my life and mission
I thought it strange, but didn’t argue,
for I love tradition,
and just between you and I,
her words gave me ambition
and not a day before had passed
without some inhibition
but then the more that I mulled
it seemed to me submission,
and that was truly quite the waste
of this apparition
I’ll never spend my second life
serving my mortician,
she carved her name into my skull
and dripped upon it wax
so I sent her off to Hell,
to, at last, relax
I sing a song to myself
just to pierce the silence
and every time a mortal knocks
I get to taste some violence
these halls, at last, are my own,
devoid of fucking heartbeats
and finally, I am alone
and free from Cherisse.

merry christmas, you filthy heathens :)

Is Cancer Really That Bad?

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i wrote this back in april, and put it up on lolbook and some other sites. i cant believe it never made its way here

Monday, 11 April 2016

Los Angeles, California – Firefly, produced by Joss Whedon, first aired on Fox in the September of 2002, and is wildly regarded by many to be one of the greatest Science Fiction television shows ever created, earning rank #5 in TV Guide’s 2013 list of series that were “Canceled Too Soon”.

Included in the family of Firefly‘s die-hard fan base is Katie Christenson, 13, of La Mirada, California, who was diagnosed with stage 3 cervical cancer early last year. With the help of her mother, Cathy, and father, Steven, she was able to contact the Make-A-Wish Foundation in late January, wishing for the opportunity to see just one more new episode of Firefly before she passes.

“It just kind of ends, you know? I understand that River and the rest of the Serenity crew get away from the Alliance, or so it seems, but we really don’t know what happens afterwards,” Katie said.

Thankfully, David Williams, CEO of the Make-A-Wish Foundation, is on her side, stating that, “For too long, we have waited for a Firefly reboot or continuation. Although Katie’s condition is truly horrible, perhaps this is what Fox needs to get off their butts and do something good for once. Not only do I support her wish, I will see to it personally.”

Katie is just like any other teenage girl. She loves to spend time at the mall with her friends in between chemotherapy appointments, and was overjoyed to go on her first date with a boy last weekend.

“His mom dropped us off at Baskin Robbins. We got some ice cream, and then John took me to see the new Star Wars movie. It wasn’t very good; it was like they were just trying to redo the original and pass it off as something new. Rey was pretty cool, but River is a much stronger female character, I think,” Katie said, when I had the chance to visit her earlier today.

Katie is truly more than a sci-fi fan, Katie is everything a sci-fi fan should be. Katie spends most of her free-time drawing and designing spaceships, thanks to the astrophysics and engineering lessons her parents have downloaded from online universities onto her laptop.

“I just can’t see any realism in the idea that we are just gonna stay on this planet and let it rot. Firefly gave me hope that although I won’t be here to see it, maybe humans can colonize space without drastically changing who we are.”

Truly touching and wise words for such a young girl.

Williams said, during a Skype interview on Thursday, regarding Fox co-CEO Dana Walden, “She’s kind of being a bitch about it. I think I’m making some leeway, but I’m not sure Fox is going to cooperate in a timely enough manner to bring Katie’s wish to fruition.”

I didn’t have much time to speak with him, but Williams is not giving up his fight for Katie’s wish. Katie started watching Firefly a few years ago, when she received the DVDs of the show for her birthday, which is in July, so Williams is desperately trying to get the fifteenth episode made in time to air on her birthday this year.

He believes Fox will probably cave, with Joss Whedon already giving the green light and the original cast agreeing to get back together for a final episode. With the difficulty Williams is facing due to all the corporate run-arounds Fox has been giving him, it is starting to seem like Katie’s wish may not come true before she passes.

Joss Whedon and Nathan Fillion, who played Malcom Reynolds, have also discussed the possibility of contacting Reed Hastings of Netflix to see if they would be willing to host the final episode of Firefly. According to Whedon, the preliminary storyboard and basic skeleton of a script should be completed by early May. Williams has stated that if Fox does not cooperate by the end of the week, he will be contacting Hastings, following the advice of Whedon and Fillion.

CCCXLIII – The Soylent Green Party

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Poor children starving, they make me so happy,
to taste their despair, it softens my own
crying ‘til their coma, they fill me with bliss,
they suffer so much, I’m hard when I piss

A brat and a tantrum, thirteen years screaming
a relationship born just south of hell
corrupt politicians feasting on the poor,
we all fuck ourselves like a five dollar whore

I poisoned the air for a pretty picture
and I cracked my mirror for a cleaner view,
the forest are burning as rivers run dry,
I clinch my wallet as I drown and die

Three cigarettes to calm me down,
and I grab another, just to make sure
there is no order, nor sense in this world,
I’d rather be dead than fetal curled

The world is in debt, but I ask, “to whom?”
and it’s gone to shit, like it always has
I beg for your ear, your reason, and life
just kill yourself to end all this strife

There is no war without a nation
and there is no debt if we don’t agree,
kill all the bankers, the puppets, and hacks
a glorious New Dawn through Harrison’s Tax

Praise be to he, who showed us our shadow,
and praise be to she, who showed us our sin
god is a lie, look around – we’re in hell,
three hits of acid to shatter this spell.

 

Wrote this about a month and a half ago. It wasn’t really up to my standards and I wasn’t really in the right mindset to revise it, so I never did. Posting it to get myself back into the habit. Hope it’s still relevant to someone.

CCCXLII – All I want for Xmas is a Secular Society

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Oh, Jesus is the reason
for this joyous season
why in this time of Yule,
we celebrate the solstice

Of Nazareth, he’s the reason
for this heinous season
let’s slaughter some Celts
and blame a pagan god

Oh, Jesus is the reason
for this lurid season
let’s just buy more shit
to force through our needle

Of Nazareth, he’s the reason
for this horrid season
for every crying brat
and stripper Mrs. Claus

Oh, Jesus is the reason
for this fucking season
there’s not a single Christian
who ever lived like Christ

Of Nazareth, he’s the reason
for this abysmal season
it’s not being oppressed
when you don’t get your way

Oh, Jesus is the reason
for this putrid season
fuck all the other gods,
kwanza, and the Jews

Of Nazareth, he’s the reason
for this repugnant season
the music’s all a pox,
coal in my socks

Religion is a fucking curse
and only Commies read
it’s clear in the bible:
Jesus was born in spring!